Behavior. The Good and the Bad.

I have moments of lucidity at the most unlikely times. At some point during the Hawkstravaganza I realised that of late my behavior has gotten out of control. I have always been prone to bouts of obsessiveness, but when it reaches the point that I realise that what I’m doing might make me cringe in the future, it’s time to stop. So it was with a deep breath that I confronted my demons today. I still have that slightly nauseated feeling that you get when you talk with someone about heavy shit, but I’m glad it’s done.

You’re no doubt wondering what the hell I’m talking about. I’m going to leave you wondering. After all, this blog is about me, not you.

Whilst I’m on the subject of my behavior, I’ve been giving more thought to my last post. The one in which I relentlessly bag my kids. It occurred to me that most twin parents go through the same thing and everyone survives. I have to take responsibility for my feelings. If someone else came to me with the same set of complaints I’d tell them to stop bitching and do something about it. So that’s what I’m going to do. I chose this life for myself, after all.

I saw on the news last night that a 34 year old man in Methven was caught doing an indecent act with a sheep. I am congratulating myself because that is proof that there are people around that behave a lot worse than I do.

I’m also wondering if it was a pretty sheep.

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2 thoughts on “Behavior. The Good and the Bad.

  1. Please don’t feel bad about your last post, I for one really appreciated it. My clock is ticking too and I still don’t know whether or not I want to have kids, pretty much for the same reasons as you mentioned. All my friends tell me I’d love being a mum but I look at their day-to-day lives with their young kids and I really have to wonder.

    I think I would find it really hard, especially those first few years. But I also strongly believe things get better as they get older and will eventually be well worth all the heartache. I would love to have adult kids 20 years from now and I know you will love it too (by the way I’m basing that statement entirely on what I know about you from having read your blog, I’m not claiming to actually know you at all.)

    It just seems that for many women babies = adorable and that’s all there is to it. I just can’t get that. To me, babies = mess + spew + slobber + no sleep + screaming + laundry with just a little bit of adorable thrown in for luck. Your reality check was refreshing. It gives me hope that there are other women out there who haven’t been brainwashed by the whole divine motherhood experience. You and your kids will come through it OK, and so will I, if I decide to go there. But believe me, if I do, venting will definitely be a vital part of the process!

    • Brilliant – thanks Jillian. 🙂

      The thing that took me by surprise was that people don’t talk about this stuff. Mothers always seem to tell you that everything is great, all of the time.

      I’m a capable person and the fact that I feel this way has got to be testament to the fact that others do too. So where the hell are they?

      Good luck with your decision. I’m not arrogant enough to tell you not to let my opinion sway you. You sound like you’ll make a great parent.

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