Door knockers

Yesterday I was dragged from my couch a couple of times by knocks at the door. Any friends know to just let themselves in at the moment so that I don’t have  to get up.

The first knock was about 10am. When my frenzied screams of “Come in” elicited no response, I dragged myself down the hallway looking fairly bedraggled and hoping that it wasn’t going to be a live TV crew coming to tell me they were going to Pimp My Ride. Needless to say, it wasn’t. It was a couple of strangers.

The man introduced himself and his friend (who was a small nervous looking lady that skulked down at the bottom of the stairs) and then started to pull a book from his bag while saying something about the season of the lord. I somewhat stupidly asked if this was something religious. It was. I told him that I wasn’t interested. He was lovely, told me to have a great day and left. Good on him.

No more than 10 minutes later there was another knock at the door. This time I had my mouth stuffed full of food but I answered the door anyway. This time there was a lady there, with an equally sheepish wingman standing at the bottom of the stairs. As she started pulling out her book I asked if it was religious. She said (in a tone that clearly implied that I was an idiot) “Yes, we’re [insert religion that I can’t remember here]”. I said thanks very much but I’m not interested. She asked me what religion I was interesetd in. I told her none. She then asked me what I thought was going to happen to me in the future. By this stage she was starting to piss me off. I told her I wasn’t actually interested in discussing it with her. She exclaimed “but you’re having a baby!”. I shut the door and left her out on the porch.

I felt like telling her that if she hurried up she’d catch up with the competition and they could fight it out in the street.

I felt a strange mixture of entertained and outraged. It got me thinking about how judged I felt by her – as if I owed it to my babies to be religious. While I appreciate that ‘those’ people feel strongly enough about their individual religions to knock on doors and try to spread the word,  I wonder how they would feel if I knocked on their door and tried to preach to them about how wrong religion is and how flawed their beliefs are.

If the non-religious were to start knocking on doors an preaching their points of view, all hell would break loose. I’m thinking of getting some brochures of my own put together so that next time they come by I can reciprocate.


3 thoughts on “Door knockers

  1. Before my grandmother moved, she had a sticker on her front window that basically said “We’re not changing our religion, so don’t even try” in Spanish. Maybe you should make/find one of those 🙂

  2. My response would have been, with all the seriousness I could muster….

    “Woah, woah, woah… I don’t know what you think is going on here, but these babies are for sacrificing. Good day.”

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