Tears

Emotions are so fickle. You can go from being on top of the world to completely miserable in the space of a few seconds. I find it so frustrating yet so tragically beautiful at the same time. It’s what makes us human.

I’ve been going on lately about what a good place I’m in. How happy I am. Then one person says one thing and it’s all blown out of the water.

Someone I love is angry with me. I’m as much to blame as I’m not. I didn’t do anything except not do anything. He had expectations of me that I was aware of but wasn’t able to do anything about. I guess it’s a classic example of how being ‘unguarded and transparent’ backfired on me. I thought I had laid it all out on the line. I thought he had too. Turns out he hadn’t. He was thinking and stewing and getting angrier and angrier.

It’s funny how emotions blind us. Anger makes us say things we regret. Love makes us behave foolishly. Excitement makes us careless. Hurt makes us vulnerable.

Is it emotion that seperates us from animals? Or the complexity of our emotions? Are there people that are more profoundly affected by their emotions than others? Or are some people just better at dealing with them? I wouldn’t be without any of them and I marvel at their ability to test me. As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned to learn from them.

But right now I feel like I’ve lost one of my best friends. I’m grateful for the others that I have.

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