Circle of friends

A month or so ago I was at a party with a group of friends. Shaun never really comes to these sorts of parties. He gets tired pretty early and takes himself home. He’s generally in bed around midnight. I call him some time the following afternoon and ask him to come and pick me up. It works well for us. If he made me go home I’d be frustrated and annoying, if I made him stay he’d get tired and grumpy.

Trust obviously plays a big part in this arrangement. There is no way Shaun would feel comfortable leaving me out to do what I want if he didn’t trust me. The only rule is that I text him and let him know where I’m going. I generally do. And I never go anywhere without a friend.

So anyway, the party last month was great fun. Until a friend of Shaun’s crossed a line and tried to kiss me in the bathroom. I declined of course, but he wasn’t very happy about that. I ended up leaving that house with bruises from his fingers on my biceps. I decided never to tell Shaun about it.

I talked to my girlfriends though. They were pretty shocked. I swore them to secrecy. Their approach is to have a united front and just ignore him when they see him. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I don’t have a huge issue with what happened. I accept that people make mistakes sometimes. My two main concerns about it are the fact that he showed such disrespect to Shaun and that if it wasn’t me, but instead a girl that was weaker or didn’t know him, things may have gotten dirty.

Now that some time has passed I feel quite sad about it. I know that sort of thing goes on all the time, I’ve just never seen it first hand. The guy in question isn’t even single himself.

Disclaimer: If you know me, don’t ask me who it was – I won’t tell you.

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5 thoughts on “Circle of friends

  1. Wow, that’s really too bad. I hope you weren’t close friends with him also, because that’s a quick way to ruin a friendship.
    So I’m assuming that Shaun still doesn’t know? I think you said before that he doesn’t read your blog. But either way, I understand why you didn’t tell him. Things could get pretty out of hand.
    Sorry to hear about that Sarah. That’s a bummer when someone acts out of their character and in turn ruins their reputation in such a vile manner.

  2. Unfortunately I get the feeling that this particular guy isn’t acting out of character… it does suck though.

    I don’t think Shaun reads this… he certainly never talks about it.

    Hmmm…. I sure as hell hope not.

  3. I’ve been thinking more about this. I almost deleted the post but I’ve decided not to. This blog has always been about blatant honesty and that’s not about to change.

  4. That’s crazy. Not trying to excuse him but decent people can do bad stuff when they’re under the influence and I’m assuming he was.
    If you don’t think it was out of character for this guy then perhaps you should either tell Shaun flat out about it or at least give him clues about the type of person he is. I don’t think Shaun would want to keep this guy as a friend if he knew how he was.

    PS Shaun probably reads this blog so you don’t really need to tell him now.

    PPS Shaun, don’t kill that guy.

  5. Yeah – good people do do bad stuff under the influence. I completely agree. I do bad stuff myself. Just not that kind of stuff.

    I’m not going to tell Shaun because he is not really in a position to cut the guy out of his life.

    I’ll just ride this one out.

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