The sound of a Hawk crying.

“Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.” Lao Tzu

I am feeling stressed. I am trying to do too much. It is completely my own fault but I am having trouble keeping it in check.

As a general rule, I am a laid back person. I don’t sweat the small stuff, and I lecture others on the same. But occasionally I forget my own mantra, and now is one of those times.

I decided a while back that I don’t want to do this job for the rest of my life. I love the learning, but I’ve been here for almost 10 years and it’s time for something new. I need work that I can do from home when I have children. I decided to design wedding stationery. After our wedding last month, when people realised that the invitations were my own, I started getting a bit of interest. I decided I had better create a brand and start to get my head around things a bit more formally.

So I started talking to people about it. My mother suggested that at the moment big weddings are fashionable, but that is not always the case, so I need to have a sideline for when times are slow. I decided to do some graphic design. Corporate branding and that sort of thing. I told a couple of people.

That was a week ago.

Now I have so much work I can’t do it all. It is ridiculous. Hence the stress. I have made it worse by filling up absolutely every evening with committments. Someone will suggest catching up for dinner. I’ll check my diary and see that Wednesday is free next week. Rather than thinking “Wednesday is my only free night next week, I’ll probably need it to relax”, I open my mouth and say “Next Wednesday is free, does that suit you?”. The next person that rings is going to have to wait three weeks for a free night. Seriously. (Admittedly I have a Youthline shift once a week). I am playing in a touch rugby team at lunchtime because I can’t afford to lose an evening.

In fact, things are so out of control that I didn’t blog yesterday!

Like I said – completely my own fault, but I needed the whinge. Now I’m good.

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2 thoughts on “The sound of a Hawk crying.

  1. I thought of you as I was writing the post… and how you had asked me the other day if I ever feel like I’m doing to much. I guess occasionally I do! Anyway, see today’s post.

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