Dan.

Yesterday 6 years ago I lost my best friend. Literally.

When god made Daniel Keys he had a blinder. If, like me, you don’t believe in a god, then I suppose you could conclude that 33 years ago, a pretty amazing line of monkeys finally evolved into something pretty special.

If I am wrong about the god thing, I guess he decided that he needed Dan more than we did, because he took him back. If I’m right about it, I wonder why on earth it happened like it did. Dan was beaten to death.

We met when I was 12 and he was 13. His eyes were the first thing I noticed. He was one of those guys that always had sunshine in his eyes. Not in the help-the-sun-is-blinding-me kind of way. More like there was always something sparkling there that made it impossible to look away.

He was a huge guy, both physically and spiritually. Captain of the First IV (rugby), head boy, over achiever, star. Dan was the person that everyone gravitated towards and I was proud to call him my best friend (well, boyfriend I guess, although for many of the years I knew him it was really the holding-hands and going to school balls together kind of boyfriend).

Every time I ran away from home I ran to Dan’s. I drank my first 6-pack at his place (and then puked and blamed his dog). He wrote me my first real love letter and protected me from bullies. We walked home from school together every day until Dan learned to drive.

I ate, slept and breathed Dan. I loved him.

When I finished school I moved away. Leaving broke my heart. I had already broken his. A couple of years later Dan moved down to Wellington and we took up again as best mates. Things were right with my world. That lasted about a year until he moved to England with his new girlfriend.

And that was the last time I ever saw him.

Dan, if you can hear me, hear that I love you. You were so much of my life for so many years and I am proud and grateful to have called you my best friend.

I miss you.